I really don’t like talking on the phone. I mean, every once in a while I don’t mind chatting with a friend who needs advice or just needs to spill the beans about their newest love interest, but, in general, being on the phone annoys me. I don’t know why people get so offended that I don’t call them, or talk to them for 45 minutes every time they call me. Being on the phone makes me feel like I’m missing out on what’s going on around me. If you want to talk, if you want company, come over, share a glass of wine with me, make dinner plans with me, lets go to the park, and I will happily engage you in what I hope will be stimulating conversation.
I started reading the bible a few months ago from the beginning. I was two thirds in, when some homeless guy on the subway yelled:
“Jesus died for your sins!”
WTF man! spoiler alert!!
I yelled back “Snape killed Dumbledore” …but he just looked confused…and dirty.